Thursday, March 20, 2008

Cancer sucks.

I saw that on a button today on a woman at MD Anderson Cancer Center. That's where I am right now. My mother was diagnosed with a primary brain tumor, probably a glioblastoma multiforme, about the 3rd of March. Time has become too quick and yet slow all at once. We were fortunate enough to get her in at MD Anderson. If you don't know, MD Anderson is the #1 cancer treatment center in America. Mom has brain surgery tomorrow to remove as much of the tumor as possible. That will likely be followed by chemo and radiation. There are so many concerns and issues that I can't begin to name them all right now. For today, I can only focus on the surgery. We can't begin to make any plans beyond that. I've journaled about this and contemplated posting those thoughts to the blog but have decided against it. Right now, I need a place to record my thoughts and fears in a private way. I'll keep the blog updated with Mom's condition and the usual stuff. I guess not much is usual these days. Mom may have to come and stay with us in KS if she is unable to care for herself. I'm not sure she wants to do that but I don't know what other alternative there could be. I know I'm rambling but it is just so unreal. So, tomorrow we wait and pray. Till later, Alicia

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Tour de Hamster

The first race is in the books ladies and gents!! The weather was warm and windy. The riders were nervous and excited. Yet, we all did a great job and had fun. Now, I have a baseline to work from in order to improve. Okay, my improve list was really really long but that's okay. Everyone starts somewhere. A few highlights from the day.

Those cat 3 dudes are really fast.

Apparently there are enough men in Cat 5 to sort the groups into over 35 and under. That is not the case for the ladies. We cycled with girls who still had acne and braces. You have no idea how much that sucks.

When an 8 year old on a bike cheers you on while rounding a corner, you will indeed feel old and fat even if they were really sincere and cute.

When you get dropped by the peleton at the very start because you're screwing around with your clipless pedals, don't get an ego and think "I can catch up!" when you are fighting a 20 mph headwind. It ain't happening.

Gear selection and drafting matter. I was spinning like a hamster on some stretches while I screwed around with my gears. Apparently screwing around with gears and pedals was a big part of my race. I should have gotten over myself and drafted with my teammate Paula.

When your teammate is panting like a dog and her heartrate monitor is beeping like mad, she isn't trying to psych you out, she's reached critical mass but can't slow down for fear of not finishing. I had to explain this to Paula who thought I was a little nuts.

When your team captain/coach tells you to warm up until you are nice and sweaty and fairly winded, he means it. It shocked the hell out of my body to go from zero to 90rpm in 6 seconds flat. That might explain why I was panting and beeping all the way around the course.

FYI to the guys on my team, I WASN'T smiling while racing--I was BREATHING!!!! Also, I appreciate the tip on zipping up my jersey. I wasn't ignoring you when you told me that, my bike shorts were hung up on my seat so I was completely unable to sit down and was trying not to plant my face into the pavement before the race even began. This is a terrifying thing to someone who just pushed off towards the lineup. Rest assured, once I "unhung" my shorts, I was able to zip that jersey up.

Just sayin'!!!!
Till later, Alicia